coping with death

[Nillus]

Although I don't know you Ron, I would like to put some stuff here.

He's mourning over a lost one, that's his choice, and I support it, He quite apparently was close to his sister, And he lost her, It's true that a million people die every day, but it's not a million people you are close to.

Yep, that's the way it is, death of someone you love isn't just dead, it's different for anyone, meaning it's very hard to deal with.

The first days you are totally in shock, the days after it you are thinking and thinking about it and at the funeral the emotical overload comes, I don't know if it has something to do with the music or seeing all your family members crying, but I guess it's the combination of both.
After the funeral you're thinking about him/her and thinking WHY and WHY everyday.
Then comes the time with the '40 knives', in The Netherlands we have something like 'time heals all the wounds', but instead of waiting and waiting till you've forgotten it you need to accept it, and keep memories to the person who passed away.

That's the way to deal with it (well, I did) but it's different for everybody, since nobody is the same and no relation with somebody is the same.

Wishing you, your family members and anyone who is broken due to her dead, the best, stay strong with each other.

Waving'
Nillus

[omerta]

do not mourn death but celebrate it
think of the good times that you have had
look back with fondness
think not of the future

[LordDemonMan]

The lectures about death are but salting his wound.
There is no point in reducing your own Time because someone's dear to you Time had been stopped.
Live on and remember her smile.

[InZan3]

@ Unie I lost the tiny respect for u, you are going to hell.
And btw being wannabe the 47 old lady is just pathetic, fucking attention seeker.

Ron im sorry to hear mate, may she R.I.P.

[Vendaku~Metal]

Though my friend, I must say this.

Don't grieve over her for to long, it'll only do your heart and mind bad. It's unfortunate indeed that she passed away. Just don't drag yourself down because of it, I'm sure she wouldn't want that.

<3

[Obbob]

All you people that said "Stfu" Or "Your a failure" I don't really care, Everyone dies, Everyone deals with it. Millions of people die every day, Do you give them the value of a doubt. Me and whoosh talked about this. Plus he posted in the spamzilla section before it was moved. Not trying to flame, Just trying to get people to be quiet.

Now I don't give a shit about the rules, you are one stupid fucking fool.
Ofcourse alot of people die everyday, but it's not everyday you lose someone who you really love. Atleast you can show some respect against Ron and the one person he lost. Get some feelings dude, don't try to be so hard over the net. IRl I would have knocked you out so hard for saying things like this.

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Ron, I'm so sorry to hear about this mate :(
All my respect, honour and heart to you and your family.
Things like this will take a long time to deal with, I lost my brother January 31 and I'm still dealing with the feelings, pain of it.
If you ever need to have someone to talk to or just to write you off to then I'm always here for you mate.

I'm so sorry mate :(

R.I.P

[shao]

a few of my family died also not so long time ago..
it was like a pain in my chest keeping my breath away...

but keep in your mind that she is in a better place now.

R.I.P

~ shao

[.YourName]

do not mourn death but celebrate it
think of the good times that you have had
look back with fondness
think not of the future

[Vendaku~Metal]

[QUOTE=.YourName;2651588]

[exclamatio]

flameing hit the nail on the head when he said take as long as you need to mourn her passing

death is always difficult when your not ready for it and especially when its some1 close like ur sister, i have had close relatives die and for a while it killed me too

every1 deals with it differently and the thing to do is express your emotions, feel the negative emotions, cry if you need mate, let it all out

i believe you must always honour the dead so like omerta said, remember how she lived! fuck how she died, everyone does die that much is true but not everyone lives. remember the special things abut her and celebrate the time she had on this earth

[Negata]

A random thought, let yourself mourn losing her (but not for her, she's in a good place now where she'll never feel pain or be let down by anyone anymore :smilie3:). Take your time with it, as long as you need, but eventually let go realizing she'd want you to live your life and she'd know you'll never forget her even if you don't show it everyday by tears. In fact - to honor her memory as soon as your tears have dried out strive to get the most out of every day and to be as happy as possible.

I know words probably don't help much right now, but the least you should get out of this thread is seeing all the replies you get and knowing there are people who care, and you can come back to this later and try and find a tiny piece of advice here and there.


P.S. Ex might remember a time or two when I had become numb of the nothingness around and mentioned I almost wished for something bad to happen just so I could feel anything, and the next day something that I had wished for but didn't want did. Maybe it's not the best kind of feeling you're having right now, but if you get a good moment see how alive you feel!

[lzy257]

T_T sad for you ron hope you are able to get through this stage try to be optmesstic that's the most important =)

[EgobrainX]

I've lost my father last year due to a word accident, the next months to come are gonna be hard, i can assure you, all i can say is the time will heal it, Death doesn't just knocks on our newbours door and its a part of life, so ill make my part and ill give you my sympathy for you and your family.

[Flameingskull]

My father died when I was 9 years old, I have almost no memories of him and time has healed nothing.

It has made me stronger as I realised that the pain is alright and if it never leaves that's alright aswell, it makes sure that I can never forget who he was and what he meant.

[Konrow]

Time shouldn't heal it. at least not fully. You should always remember the person and if you can't you should always treasure what you know about them. You cannot just forget about them. There should always be part of you that mourns for them and longs to see for them. That is just how humans work, if someone you love dies, there will always be some feeling towards them even after they are gone.

[DeadlyHit]

Wow Ron sorry to hear this.

Only times ive experienced someone close to me die when i was young so i really wasnt fully aware but im pretty sure i cryed D=

[Bejike]

Sorry to hear about that man. When I was younger, I lost my grandmother, aunt, and dog (sounds gay, but I had her since I was a pup, so she was like family.) but I was too young to really "understand" death and cope with it. But now, as I've matured, god forbid my mother or anybody close to me died, I wouldn't know what to do to be honest. =\ If it helps, when ever something is wrong with me, I talk to a good friend or something, it always helps me. Wish you best man, and may your sister RIP.

[cloakedmapl]

hey ron, 3 of my family members died in the same summer, I know how it feels especially a sister or brother. My grandmother, half brother and a good friend of mine died What I tend to do is try and hang out with my friends or do anything that I like best to keep my mind off of it, reading is usually one of the best things to do

Though, I do agree with unie even though he said it in harsh terms, you do have to try and get over it as best as you can because once their gone they aren't coming back

My rule is that you should live life to the fullest and remember that person the best until they died because then after they're dead why think about them if you know it's not possible to see em ya know?

well anyways, you have my condolences and I'm terribly sorry for your problems

[ElMarshal]

Bad news Ron, sorry about your loss, i have no tips to give...

[JC/Raiden]

hey ron, 3 of my family members died in the same summer, I know how it feels especially a sister or brother. My grandmother, half brother and a good friend of mine died What I tend to do is try and hang out with my friends or do anything that I like best to keep my mind off of it, reading is usually one of the best things to do

Though, I do agree with unie even though he said it in harsh terms, you do have to try and get over it as best as you can because once their gone they aren't coming back

My rule is that you should live life to the fullest and remember that person the best until they died because then after they're dead why think about them if you know it's not possible to see em ya know?

well anyways, you have my condolences and I'm terribly sorry for your problems

I respect you for trying to tell it how it is, especially when your not being a jackass about it either. But not remembering that persons memory once there gone, to me just shows ignorance because you can't ignore the fact that they were once alive, and a loved one to you.

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Ron...Celebrate your sisters life, Don't just try and force yourself to just forget your sister because its to painful to deal with. Your human, bottling up your emotion will only drive you mad. Respect your sisters memory by thinking about the good times you both had together, and know that shes gone to a much better place.

Its not the end of the road for your sister mate, because although she may not be with you in a physical form I'm possitive she'll be with you in spirit and will always be keeping an eye on you ;).

Takecare mate, all the best to you and your family.

[Jare]

Give yourself a day or two to have personal grieving time.
In grievances there is nothing wrong with shedding tears, it's your sister.

Don't solitude yourself for a long time though, it really feels helpless when you start
doing that.

Just like that dick, I have also dealt with death, but this is some tips to actually help you, and not just be a dipshit.

My condolences,
Jare

[cloakedmapl]

who's the dick? o-o

anyway I never suggested in forgetting, but not putting your life too much back into what's sad. that's all. anyways a thread like this probably won't really help you. You should find your own way of dealing with it as best as you can. That would be the best of all