History of Gaming

[Daedius]

Just a copy/paste quotation from another forum, thought it was funny :P

[quote='Lucienne Mireille',index.php?page=Thread&postID=117611#post117611]i just went through my IRC logs, tumbled over the AR-Channel txt and remembered when KROG gave us a lesson about gaming history.
now, to share this wisdom with you, i edited it so i can post it here.
may you be enlighten...

after the video game economy exploded when the atari bombed
NO ONE would stock video games
it was suicide--they were a dead fad
they only really existed in arcades
so then Nintendo comes along
and they're like we're part insane, part brilliant
and they're like here stock my NES to stores
and stores are like WTF videogames GTFO
so then Nintendo bundles ROB into their consoles and the stores are like
oh it's a toy i get it
DEFINITELY NOT A VIDEO GAME SYSTEM
except no one gives a shit about ROB
people tried Super Mario Bros
OMFG THIS GAEM HAS LIEK 16 COLORS BEST EVER
the rest is history
the PS1 was an expansion for the SNES originally
Nintendo was like wow we ought to do something about Sega they're raping us
hey Sony come bail us out
Sony: sure, why not *builds console*
Nintendo: hahah, you stupid fool, I've already gotten my request from Philips
Philips: =D
Sony: wtf teamkiller
*leaves and launches playstation*
Philips: neato i got the zelda license
*churns out shitty games like mad*
Nintendo: i don't think so *sends cease and desist*
Nintendo: >_> well that didn't work out well... OH WELL ON TO THE N64
CARTRIDGES WILL BE GOOD BECAUSE THEY COST A FORTUNE TO PRODUCE AND STORE A FRACTION OF THE INFANITELY CHEAPER DISKS
Sony: loooooooooool
*rapes Nintendo*
Nintendo: oh goddammit that generation sucked, BUT THE GAMECUBE WILL SOLVE EVERYTHING WITH ITS "4KIDS" IMAGE
Sony: loooooooool *rapes Nintendo even harder*
Sega: I've made the most beautiful system ever, it's called the Dreamcast and it has some of the best games of it's ti--
Sony: STFU *crushes*
Sega: =(
Sony: well now that i've won two generations in a row time to shoot my head off about stupid things my next console can do
Sony: it will be able to perform quantum physics and represent the fourth dimension
Sony: The next generation doesn't start until Sony says it does!
Sony: oh and by the way it costs FIVE HUNDRED NINTY-NINE US DOLLARS
fanboys: wtf
Nintendo: i think i learned my lesson better stop getting pillaged
Microsoft: yeah we're just kind of there
Nintendo: GO MY WII WRECK HAVOK WITH YOUR REMARKABLY PHALLIC NAME
everyone: LMFAO NINTENDO'S GONNA LOSE AGAIN WITH A NAME LIKE THAT
*Nintendo proceeds to dominate the industry*
Sony: halp we're drowning in all the fiscal lard we made over the past generation

MEANWHILE ON THE HANDHELD FRONT
Game and Watch: i'm the game and watch and i kind of suck
everyone: yeah you do *buys millions of them anyways*
Linx: check it out i'm atari!
revived game industry: GTFO
Game Boy: I'm the game boy and I KICK ASS
Atari: STFU Game Boy *tries to get Tetris rights*
Game Boy: *ninjas Tetris rights and sends a cease and desist*
Atari: aww shucks =( *goes bankrupt for the 5th time*
Game Boy: ITS RAPING TIME *sells millions with the help of Tetris*
Game Gear: well u suk dued i'm 16 bit
Game Boy: yeah well I have tetris and you eat 6 batteries in the time it takes me to load my title BIOS
Game Gear: wel, uh, yeah, uh.... u suk!
Game Boy: k *proceeds to decimate Game Gear*
Game.com: ....... *dies*
Game Boy gained 600 experience points!
Game Boy gained a level and learned COLOR
Wonderswan: I'm here to kick ass and take names but i'm all out of developer support right after my launch *dies*
Game Boy Color: NEXT
Game Boy Advance: hi i'm here to replace you
Game Boy Color: NOOOOOOOOOO MY LEGACY
Game Boy Advance: fear not you shall live on within me *consumes*
N-GAGE: THE N-GAGE IS THE LATEST AND GREATEST NEW HANDHELD GAMES SYSTEM FROM NOKIA! BUILT TO SERVE AS BOTH A HANDHELD AND A PHONE, THE N-GAGE COMES WITH ITS 32-BIT ARM-9 PROCESSOR AND AN AMAZINGLY IRRITATING WAY OF SWITCHING CARTRIDGES! NOKIA IS TRULY THE FUTURE
Game Boy Advance: GTFO
N-GAGE: YEAH WELL NOKIA WOULD LIKE TO ANNOUNCE THEY'RE DROPPING SUPPORT FOR THE N-GAGE, BUT IT MAY BE RETURNED IN THE FU-
Game Boy Advance: GTFO
Tapwave Zodiac: We are pleased to announce the Zo-*cancelled*
Nintendo DS: hi GBA, we can coexist can't we?
Game Boy Advance: of course! I'll just pretend I don't see the GBA slot on the bottom
DS: >_> oh goddammit
*consumes GBA*
DS: Well now what
PSP: hi i'm back from the console front to rape you Nintendo
PSP: with a 400 dollar price tag
DS: oh god getting raped
DS: *greases self up and starts sashaying around PSP* hey hot guy I'm the DS Lite now
PSP: WTF *explodes*
Japan: OMG MUST BUY DS *breaks 120 million in sales*
Squeenix: bye Sony we're going to put Dragon Quest IX on the DS
Sony: ****.
PSP: *dead, with the occasional rigomortise effect simulating life from the odd Monster Hunter portable release*
and the rest, as they say, is history
i forgot to mention the Zune, but eh, oh well
it'd probably be like
Microsoft: we're proud to announce that we are constructing a handheld device for entertainment
Nintendo: uh oh
Sony: *PSP is dead anyways*
Microsoft: our new device will be called the Zune
Nintendo: please don't intrude on my massive marketshare! Wii60 mirite guyz!? .....guyz?
Microsoft: actually it plays MP3s and that's about it
Nintendo: ...................oh.

footnote: [b][color=#ff00ff]

[MentaL]

[CodeinCody]

Let me just say, History of Video games Started With Ralph Baer.

[bustermachine]

That was interesting.

[ImaMoFoThief]

rofl i know this by the back of my hand :P

[TimTheLord]

I found it fun :D

[Parker]

That was awesome hahaha.
Sony was like 'Wtf team killers'.

[CrownC]

I didn't find it funny. Just not my taste ofhumor:P

[iBimbo]

Didnt find it fun either -.-

Could it be the font colors wich is annoying the eyes ? xD

[Pfa]

I found it interesting... it didn't have anything about xbox :P

[-GB.]

Haha, well that was 'interesting' to read lol.

[exclamatio]

hahaha that was fucking top, + + + to whoever wrote it

[-fedexer-]

Yeah that was really good, very humorous =D