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Beatles Parodies

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THE DISGRUNTLED POSTAL WORKERS SONG
(Geoff Bailey)(sung to the tune of "Yesterday")

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away
'Cause I blew them away with a .38
Oh I believe in yesterday

Suddenly, the Postal Service isn't half it used to be
Seems I've lost my sanity
Oh yesterday came suddenly

My boss said something wrong, now he's gone
I blew him away

I left three people dead, plus ten wounded
But now I have to pay

'Cause today, I'm tried in Superior Court 'cause of yesterday
They're sending me to death row so I can pay
Oh I believe in yesterday

Why to death row, I don't know
They wouldn't say

I guess I kind of snapped, now I'm in deep crap
I'm going to pay

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away
'Cause I killed them with a .38
Oh I believe in yesterday
(mmm-mmm-mmm-mm-mmm-m-mmmmm)

R+J
"R+J" sung to the tune of "PENNY LANE"

Verona Beach there is a slacker named Romeo
He's all depressed and then he goes into a slag
Where Mercutio, dressed in drag
Is a dancing fag

Juliet is at the house cuz she's a Capulet
Then they meet at the big aquarium scene
But then Tybalt starts to vent his spleen
He is really mean -- really mean

R+J is in my ears and in my eyes
Baz has made a new cult epic
Using Hollywood's hot young

But in Verona things are starting to really suck
Though Romeo and Juliet did fall in love
Their families have no love
They must go above

So Juliet goes to the priest who is a potash freak
And he tells her she must pretend to die
Meanwhile Romeo has been forced to fly
He made Tybalt die -- that's no lie

R+J is in my ears and in my eyes
Baz has made a new cult epic
Using Hollywood's hot young

But Romeo comes back and sees the corpse of Juliet
And he decides to take his own life in vain
Then Juliets eyes start to rain
She's in so much pain -- kills herself again

R+J is in my ears and in my eyes
Baz has made a new cult epic
Using Hollywood's hot young (REPEAT TILL FADE)

Lucy In the Sky With Diode
(author: Tony Wilson)

Picture yourself with software to deliver
Your code won't compile with two thousand tries
Somebody calls to walk through your new program
A girl with oscilloscope eyes

Silicon RAM chips that mess up your screen
Showering rays through your head
Look for your brain at the end of the day
And it's gone
Lucy in the sky with diodes
Lucy in the sky with diodes
Lucy in the sky with diodes

Follow her down past her desk by a mountain
Of documentation, you ask yourself why
Everyone smiles as you fumble through spec sheets
That read so incredibly dry

Verification appears such a chore
Yawning the hours away
Climb up a wall looking for the dead code
Then you're gone
Lucy in the sky with diodes
Lucy in the sky with diodes
Lucy in the sky with diodes

Picture yourself with your own new workstation
With parallel ports and a fast floppy drive
Suddenly someone is there with your paycheck
The girl with oscilloscope eyes
Lucy in the sky with diodes
Lucy in the sky with diodes
Lucy in the sky with diodes

Berkeley 4.3
Original : Yellow Submarine
Author : Jim Finnis

In the RAM
where I was forked,
lived a ROM,
who sailed the C...

And he told,
me of his life,
in the Berkeley,
4.3...

We all live in the Berkeley 4.3,
Berkeley 4.3, Berkeley 4.3.
We all live in the Berkeley 4.3,
Berkeley 4.3, Berkeley 4.3.

Write in C

When I find my code in tons of trouble,
Friends and colleagues come to me,
Speaking words of wisdom:
"Write in C."

As the deadline fast approaches,
And bugs are all that I can see,
Somewhere, someone whispers:
"Write in C."

Write in C, Write in C,
Write in C, oh, Write in C.
LOGO's dead and buried,
Write in C.

I used to write a lot of FORTRAN,
For science it worked flawlessly.
Try using it for graphics!
Write in C.

If you've just spent nearly 30 hours
Debugging some assembly,
Soon you will be glad to
Write in C.

Write in C, Write in C,
Write in C, yeah, Write in C.
Only wimps use BASIC.
Write in C.

Write in C, Write in C
Write in C, oh, Write in C.
Pascal won't quite cut it.
Write in C.

Write in C, Write in C,
Write in C, yeah, Write in C.
Don't even mention COBOL.
Write in C.

(and what about C++ ?)

Yellow Subroutine
Author : adrian@milton.u.washington.edu

"In the town where I was born,
Lived a man, who played with 'C'.
And he coded his whole life
On a stack of Function Keys.

So we traced to his data schemes,
Til we found a 'C' routine..
And we lived beneath the SAVES,
In our yellow Sub-Routine...

Chorus:
WE ALL live in A YELLOW SUB-ROUTINE,
YELLOW SUB-ROUTINE, YELLOW SUB-ROUTINE .... (ETC)

When our friends are on the boards,
Many MODEMS RETURN NEXT:FOR
Then the BAUD RATE goes astray...
(B-B-BEEP, BEEP BEEP B-B-BEEP..)

Chorus (IF YOU CAN STAND IT!)

As we live in Memories
Every one of us Returns Linefeeds...
CPU and 'C' Routine,
In our yellow SUB-Routine...

Bill Gates
(to the tune of Get Back by the Beatles)

Bill Gates was a man who thought he wasn't a loser
But Microsoft wouldn't last..
Bill Gates who came up with DOS and the nice Windows
is planning for the net control.

Bill Gates! Bill Gates!
The net isn't belong to you.
Bill Gates! Bill Gates!
The net isn't belong to you.
Get back, Bill Gates. Go home!

The great man named Bill Gates thought he wasn't a geek.
but his crews are surly geeks.
Some people around him say he's got it building.
But he builds it while he can.

Bill Gates! Bill Gates!
The net isn't belong to you.
Bill Gates! Bill Gates!
The net isn't belonged to you.
Get back, Bill Gates. Go home!

Oh! Bill Gates! Bill Gates!
The net isn't belong to you.
Yeah! Bill Gates! Bill Gates!
The net isn't belong to you.
Get back, Bill Gates. Go home!

Yesterday
lyrics: John L. Berger


Yesterday
All my troubles seemed so far away.
Microsoft brought new ones here to stay.
Oh, how I wish for yesterday.

Suddenly,
Nothing works at all efficiently.
GPFs are running rampantly.
Oh, Microsoft, just please leave me!

Why we had to go
To Windows 95
I couldn't say.
Windows just works wrong.
How I long for yesterday.

Suddenly,
OS/2 was praised triumphantly
But was marketed pathetically.
Now 95 is haunting me.

Why 95 is alive
I just can't say.
Bill just stole the Mac
And went back
To Yesterday.

Ah yesterday --
So where do I want to go today?
To a place where Gates is far away.
Oh, how I wish for yesterday.

(up) A DAY ON THE NET
(A Day In The Life)(Alex Hander)

I read a post today, oh boy
About a boring man, who made a page
And though the page was rather bad
Well I just had to laugh
Tho' I had read just half

He saw a .gif today, oh boy
It had a well known pic; used before
A crowd of surfers clicked on "Back"
I headed for the door
I've seen that pic before

I'd love to log... on...

Woke up, got on the net
T'get as much, as I could get
Found my way inside, a chat room
But that chat room, would soon be my tomb

Ahhhhhhh....

In My Server
(to the tune of In My Life) (Pong)

There are bugs in my server.
All the night, they erase my files
those remainers not for better
some have gone and some remain
all these bugs had their moments
with hackers and friends
who made system calls
bugs aren't dead and still living
In my life I've hated them all..

But of all these bugs on my servers
there is no one compared with Worm
All my memmories have been missing.
when I try to save as someting new
Though I know I'll never lose my frustration
for those bugs that kill my files before
I know I'll often stop and erase them
In my life I hate them more..


Though I know I'll never lose my frustration
for those bugs that kill my files before
I know I'll often stop and erase them
In my life I hate them more..
In my life I hate them more..

All You Need Is Ram
RAM, RAM, RAM
RAM, RAM, RAM
RAM, RAM, RAM

There's no code you can do that can't be done
Nothing on cache memory that can't be saved
If something crash but you can avoid by adding memory
It's easy

There's no memomory on PC that can't be full
No files on your hard drive that can't be saved
For code that your wrote but it runs slow.. go and get more RAM
It's easy

All you need is RAM
All you need is RAM
All you need is RAM, RAM
RAM is all you need

RAM, RAM, RAM
RAM, RAM, RAM
RAM, RAM, RAM
 
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