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*still exists*
Loyal Member
Feb 18, 2003
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Havent made a thread for a very long time so i thought.... what the hell.

Donald Rumsfeld died and went to heaven (doubtful). As he stood in front
St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.
asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a
Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said Rumsfeld, "whose clock is that?" "That's Mother Teresa's. The

hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."

"Incredible," said Rumsfeld. "And whose clock is that one?" St. Peter
responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice,
telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's Bush's clock?" asked Rumsfeld.

"Bush's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."

Experienced Elementalist
Jul 1, 2003
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I have 1 about heaven/hell and it ironizez billgates and microsoft.
U kno how the game demos r cool and u can't w8 to see the full thing and then the full thing sux...

some dude dies and gose to the after life...god shows him heaven:kinda boring, everybody just praising god. Hell: partyes, chiks, booze, sex all the poop. He thinks "why the duck everybody sais hell is a bad palce" . So he choses to go to hell. When he gets there he is tortured and wot not. After an infernal week he calls to god and asks for an explanation coz when god showed him hell it woz cool and god says "THAT WOZ JUST A DEMO!!!!".
Not that funy but i woz bored so i had notin better to do.:rolleyes: