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Loyal Member
Dec 31, 2004
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One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind

him,"My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor."

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.

"There's a diagnostic computer down at K-Mart. Just give it a urine

sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about

it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars...a lot cheaper than a


So Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to K-Mart. He

deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine

sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.

Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis

elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy

activity It will improve in two weeks." Thank you for shopping @


That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe

began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap

water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and

daughter, and a sperm

sample for good measure. Joe hurries back to K-Mart, eager to check the

results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits

the results.

The computer prints the following:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)

2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)

3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.

4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.

5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get


Thank you for shopping @ K-Mart
duck you, I'm a dragon
Loyal Member
Apr 29, 2005
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Dude thats older then time itself, still funny though.