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- Jun 23, 2004
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LITTLE TONY ON MATHS
Little TONY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father?
The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3', I said "6'", replies TONY.
"But that's right!" says his dad.
Yeah, but then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?'"
"What's the fucking difference?" asks the father.
"That's what I said!"
LITTLE TONY ON ENGLISH
Little TONY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going
to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of
a multi-syllable word?"
TONY says "Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little TONY, that's a mouthful."
Little TONY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR
Little TONY was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed to go
to the bathroom. He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!"
The teacher replied, "Now, TONY, that is NOT the proper word to use in this
situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate'. Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go."
Little TONY, thinks for a bit, and then says, "You're an eight, but if you
had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!"
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR
One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show
of hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same
sentence twice.
First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my
mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.
My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."
She said, "Excellent, Michael!" Then the teacher reluctantly called on
little TONY.
Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was
pregnant, and he said 'Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!'"
LITTLE TONY ON GETTING OLDER
Little TONY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar
after another. After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him
said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you
acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."
Little TONY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"
Little TONY answered, "No, he minded his own fucking business.
Little TONY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father?
The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3', I said "6'", replies TONY.
"But that's right!" says his dad.
Yeah, but then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?'"
"What's the fucking difference?" asks the father.
"That's what I said!"
LITTLE TONY ON ENGLISH
Little TONY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going
to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of
a multi-syllable word?"
TONY says "Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little TONY, that's a mouthful."
Little TONY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR
Little TONY was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed to go
to the bathroom. He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!"
The teacher replied, "Now, TONY, that is NOT the proper word to use in this
situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate'. Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go."
Little TONY, thinks for a bit, and then says, "You're an eight, but if you
had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!"
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR
One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show
of hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same
sentence twice.
First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my
mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.
My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."
She said, "Excellent, Michael!" Then the teacher reluctantly called on
little TONY.
Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was
pregnant, and he said 'Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!'"
LITTLE TONY ON GETTING OLDER
Little TONY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar
after another. After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him
said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you
acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."
Little TONY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"
Little TONY answered, "No, he minded his own fucking business.
that's fuking great
