What in the name of Odin did you just say about me, you little peasant? I'll have you know I am the finest with an ax in all of the north, and I've been involved in numerous hit and run raids on monasteries, and I've killed over 300 peasants. I am trained in all types of warfare and I'm the top swordsman in all of the Norse lands. You are nothing to me but just another source of loot. I will destroy you with swordsmanship the likes of which has never been seen before in all of Yggdrasil, mark my Ducking words. You think you can get away with saying that poop to me using a messenger raven? Think again, peasant. As we speak I am assembling my army of Viking warriors and we're sailing for your village right now, so you better prepare for the storm, peasant. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're Ducking dead, peasant. I can be anywhere, anytime, and can kill you in over 700 ways, and that's just with my ax and sword. Not only am I extensively trained in hand to hand combat, but I have access to an entire Viking army and I will use it to its full extent to send your miserable butt to Helheim, you little poop. If you could only have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you could have held your Ducking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you godsdamn idiot. I will poop fury all over you and you'll drown in it. You're Ducking dead, peasant.
